it really doesn't help that i feel roughly the same about hrt, after that one time i got drugged with mdma and then injected with estradiol without consent
@munin i think she did it so that she'd have an easier time raping me? she did something similar (not literally the same actions but same general idea) to someone else
@munin i spent a year with no hrt at all after orchi and to this day it feels better to exist that way
the main reason we still use estradiol (injectables, too) is to reduce fatigue (primary) and prevent bone density loss (secondary)
it does not bring me joy, i don't really like the mental state it puts me in, and (unsurprisingly) i do not really enjoy any sort of sexuality while on it, vs. with no sex hormones at all
@whitequark@munin I've said before, they need to invent a hormone that doesn't masculinize or feminize, it just keeps your bones from going away and your brain from fogging. I need less gender, not more.
@whitequark@munin anyway I'm in the second camp. I was pursuing it and after 9 months my HMO said I was too fat for vaginaplasty. so either I find new insurance or lose like 100lb/45kg. I'm slightly bitter